Face about The Scotia pub Glasgow - Copy


The Scotia bar!
A famous part
In Glasgow's history!
First opened in the year,
Of seventeen eighty-two!
With at that time,
All the
Modern convenience,
That you needed
To see you through!
A men’s only bar,
No women allowed,
Within its
Hallowed door!
Brass hooks were hung
To hang your
Jacket or coat,
Right at the bar,
As on
Wee dram
Or beer,
Your mind
Would float!
Brass Match lighters,
Screwed on
Just beneath
The bar top,
Used by many
In their time
Whose smoking habit,
They did not
Want to stop!
Solid wood columns,
Carved woodwork of note!
And a musical atmosphere,
That many can quote!
Great people and bar!
The home of
Many a home grown,
Music star!
Lots of laughter,
Many play instruments
And sing!
By the look of
The cash notes,
From pegs,
Above the bar,
They are now
Into Money,
But the
Pis de resistance
About this
Places history,
That not many know!
Is that in the old days
Recycled beer,
Through the bar
Would flow!
At the bottom
Of the bar front,
Still there
To this day,
For all to see!
Is a trough,
Where the men,
Used to pee!
As some would say!
Pure Luxury!
If you are looking
For live music,
This is the place!
The Scotia!
You are sure
To leave,
With a smile,
On your

David Nicoll







Went to get a denture repair

At Glasgow Geggies,

Cosmetic denture design,

Standing outside the shop,

Having a smoke,

Without my

Bottom dentures,

Not smiling,

Or feeling fine!

Just reading their sign!

Then this woman

Like a Black crab,

Scuttled over the pavement,

To squat right next to me!

She looked really rough,

That much I could see!

She then put a large

Lighter fuel container

Up to her lip,

Then proceeded

To take either

A breath of it,

Or a sip?

She had

Two cylinders of it,

A big problem,

Without a doubt!

Having two of them,

In case the one runs out!

Where was her head?

With all these solvents,

Poisons and gases,

Running through her


Body and brain!

The act of doing it,

In public is in

Itself Insane!

What a pity, so sad!

“Can I take a

Photo of you?”

I asked ,

Then she stuck her

Tongue out to show,

That she was bad!

The words going

Through my mind,

Like lyrics,

For a song!

“This lady is not

Going to live long!”

“Can I have a fag?”

She asked of me,

Then thinking,

If I give her one,

It could

Create a calamity!

Sucking on

Her lighter fuel

Through a canister

Instead of a cup,

I told her,

If I give you a

Lit cigarette after

You swallowing that,

You are likely

To blow up!

Felt very sorry

For her situation,

At one time

She would have been

Someone’s sister,

Mother or Honey,

Bent down and

Gave her

Some money!

Was that

A wise thing to do?

Will she buy food?

Or another





David Nicoll




End up with a loose

Lower tooth,

“As well to take it out!”

The dentist said to me!

“Aye well ok then,

Makes no difference to me!”

“We will add more teeth

Onto your lower denture!”

Says he to me!

“Come back in a couple of weeks

And we will have another session,

Then I will take an impression!”

So back I go,

Mouth open,

Getting impression set,

When he told me something,

That made me quite upset!

“We will need

To have the denture

For four days!”

Is what he did say!

My reply being


But this is Friday!

No way!”

So he gave

Two numbers to me,

One of which

Turned out

To be,

Johnny boy at

Glamorous Geggie!

Well, now this man,

Is a character to see!

“I have been operating

From this shop,

Since nineteen seventy three!

When I arrived here,

I had long curly brown hair!”

Although the years

Have treated him well,

And with his work,

He is indeed a


And takes great care!

Working away most of the time,

Creating dentures takes a while!

But after the wait,

Everyone leaves

With a new smile!

So if your dentures

Are giving you problems

And you live near Glasgow way!

Get Glamorous Geggies

To fix you up,

In only one hour,

Is what I say!

Which is an

Awful lot better

Than having

A half empty mouth

For more than one day!

We have

Something in common

As it turns out,

In the form of our surname

As they are almost the same!

He is Nicol,

I am Nicoll!

But there is an


Of a difference!

I really, really,

Like this man,

We obviously come

From a


But ever so






David Nicoll